Thirteen Things we get yelled at for:
1. Titus: Eating kitty box crunchies from the litter box and bunny poop in the yard.
2. Tazo: Eating a plastic bag.
3. Earl Grey: Running out the back door. I just want to be outside. It looks like so much fun. Titus gets go outside. Why not me? "Better inside and fat than outside and flat." Poo! I don’t know how Mom comes up with that nonsense.
4. Tazo: Chewing cords – cable, phone, electrical, whatever. They’re just so tasty. Except when Momma puts that habanero sauce on there. That stuff makes my mouth a little hurty.
5. Earl Grey: Putting the bitey on Tazo and Titus until they cry. I’m just "playing."
6. Titus: Chasing rabbits and squirrels outside.
7. Titus: Getting in the trash can in the kitchen. But I only do that if there’s super tasty stuff in there. Which there never is anymore because Momma's wised up lately.
8. Earl Grey: Looking like I'm even thinking about eating anything other than kibble. I just do that to mess with Momma. It’s fun to watch her freak out. Like, I pretend to eat toilet paper and then she gets all excited. Then she says that she should have had the V-E-T put a zipper on my belly when I had my surgery. I don't like it when she says that.
9. Tazo and Earl Grey: Waking Momma up too early on the weekend. Our tummy clocks go off at the same time every day. Sorry, it can’t be helped. Breakfast needs to be served promptly at 5:37 am. Just wait until the clocks get set back in the fall. Heh heh
10. Earl Grey: Getting overzealous in my litterbox scratching and throwing litter outside of the box and onto the floor. I am just very thorough. What can I say?
11. Tazo: Putting the bitey on Momma’s kneecap and other places that we won’t mention on the internet. I’m just trying to wake her up. I'm sorry if it leaves a little bruise. My tummy is hungry. I'm not as careful in my biteys when I'm distracted by my rumbly tummy.
12. Titus: Playing lion tamer with the twins. They are the ones trying to stick their heads in my mouth. Momma then thinks she has to remind me that I can only put my mouth on their feet and tails ("Feet and tails, T, feet and tails. Remember?") – because she says they can live without those if I get too excited and chomp them. I’m not allowed to bite heads or tummies.
13. Earl Grey: Climbing in the cupboard where they keep the plates and bowls. I don’t see anything wrong with me sitting on their plates. My ‘tocks are clean. Super clean, in fact. I’m very into ‘tock maintenance. Well, except for that one time…