Thursday Thirteen - Edition 35

EG here. The Mom has been very sick this week and hasn't been able to HELP US BLOG. :( But I digress. She's feeling lots better and has been thanking us for taking such good care of her for the last few days. We've heard that some other beans have been under the weather lately, too, so we thought that we'd share what we learned this week about caring for sick beans.

Thirteen Things That Are Very Important in the Care of Sick Beans

1. When a bean is frowing up in the human litterbox, they really like it if you put your front paws up on the toilet and watch. Snoopervising is very important.

2. When beans have high fevers (not fev-vers!) and are very achy, it is important to jump on them and walk all over. Boobwalking at this point is very, very important.

3. Thundering Herd of Elephants is a great distraction from the beans' misery. Especially at 3 am. This great distraction is very important.

4. If your bean is too sick to get up to feed you at regular mealtimes, MA-ROW-ing must begin 30 minutes before the scheduled meal. And continue at increased volumes until they are roused from the couch. Sticking to a schedule is very important.

5. A sleeve of saltines that is placed near the bean's head is meant to be stolen. It is important that beans get their exercise during this time by chasing you down the hallway, staggering the whole way because they are weak and dizzy. Then growl at them when they try to take your crackers away. heh heh

6. When the bean has the chills, cuddling is very important.

7. Drinking straws are to be stolen from the sick bean's glass.

8. Ginger ale should always be sampled.

9. Jello is not the same without a paw print in it. Or a couple of furs.

10. Most of your normal, daily routines should be adjusted (or even suspended) until the bean feels better, with the exception of the following: scheduled mealtimes, trips to the litterbox, grooming, Thundering Herd of Elephants, and napping.

11. Chewing holes in the plastic bag that your bean stores under his/her pillow in case of a vomitous-type emergency is very, very important. Chewing holes in the *bottom* of the bag is a great way to show that you care.

12. While the sick bean is on the couch/in bed/wherever, make noises in another room that sound naughty. Clanking around, opening cupboards, chewing on plastic, that sort of thing. The most important part of this item is that when the bean staggers into the room that you're in, you must just be sitting there, looking at them like they're crazy.

13. The bitey must be suspended during the duration of the beans' illness.

Ok, well, one more...
14. Purring is very good medicine.